Do note, this is not a sex conversation between a husband and wife. 😉 Cheers, Jammy ———X——–X——— Date: 7 January, 2017 Time: 7.15 pm IST From: Rekha [[email protected]] To: Jammy [[email protected]] Subject: Re: Re: Late? BTW, hope you have dropped the cheque, sorted out the water heater, and taken the Demand Draft in my father’s name?
For more than a year, my extended family had been laboring on my behalf, receiving and rejecting proposals.
BTW, I wanted to know what time you will be reaching coz I want you to have a word with our 3-year-old daughter tonight. Your daughter has changed her boy friend again – for the third time in the last five months. Regards, Rekha ———X——–X——— Date: 8 January, 2017 Time: 7.04 pm IST From: Jammy [[email protected]] To: Rekha [[email protected]] Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Thought I might as well change the subject 9 pm works for me too.
Regards, Rekha ———X——–X——— Date: 7 January, 2017 Time: 7.34 pm IST From: Jammy [[email protected]] To: Rekha [[email protected]] Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Late? I want her to behave like a good family girl – not be some flower-power girl from the 70s. I will be late today, but can you catch her attention before she hits the bed today and have a word with her? I have no idea how a woman decides on her boyfriends. And I agree, we now-a-days only speak thro’ emails. Cheers, Jammy ———X——–X——— Date: 8 January, 2017 Time: 6.45 pm IST From: Rekha [[email protected]] To: Jammy [[email protected]] Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Thought I might as well change the subject Yeah…call is good. Will be in my car heading for a business dinner with some investors.
Some love my story because it appears to confirm their belief that America is doing it wrong: "Kids nowadays—having sex in middle school! Child brides and dowry burnings on the one hand, or henna and Bollywood on the other. But by the time I turned 20, I knew my arranged marriage was set in stone. Yes, he and I picked each other out of the proposals our families offered us. When Alex and I got married, all we had was our raw selves. All marriages, arranged or not, eventually hinge on compromise and change. Alex didn’t pursue me; in the economy of the arrangement, he didn’t have to. Since neither of us freely chose, neither of us tasted the deep pleasures of being freely chosen.
I grew up in the United States, a product of New England suburbia, evangelical Christianity, Wellesley College, But I always knew my marriage would be arranged. Still, I dated secretly in high school and college, hoping that my parents (conservative, first-generation immigrants from India) would change their minds and terrified at the prospect that they wouldn’t. Saying "no" (though I still longed to) was not an option—the stakes in our honor-and-shame-based family were too high. Based on those 20 minutes in my family room, I decided he was a likeable guy. But accommodating a spouse is an entirely different activity from enjoying her. On the other hand, I’m married to a good man who is my partner and my equal.