Over the past few years it seems that almost every dating dilemma I hear from my coaching clients and girlfriends has something to do with the texting. He told her how busy he was and she felt flattered that he was keeping in touch.
Texting and dating definitely isn’t just for 20 year olds anymore. “Melissa” stayed up until 3 AM texting with her dude. She wants to know how to stop obsessing over him being The One.
These discussions aren’t all that different from those of generations past: pick up lines have always been picked apart and the art of the voicemail analyzed by singles long before the advent of texting.
And many of the old, gendered traditions of who reaches out to whom and when have (for better or worse) persisted.
All this begs the question: how do we most effectively date in the digital world?
Each text was carefully analyzed for hidden meaning.
(I've never gotten past texting; I actually have no idea what real dating is like.) Trust me on this.
If you get a well-typed, thoughtful paragraph about her bad day or his dinner suggestions, the most impactful response is a nice "k." Or "cool." Or how about "ha." That one always works.
I’ve seen countless women create complete fantasies and get drawn in — often before they even meet a man. With no tonality in messages, texting back and forth creates enormous opportunities to misread and misunderstand intent.
I can’t tell you how many emails I’ve received from coaching clients with a text conversation pasted in and the question: What do you think he means (aka WTF)????